"Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it." Luke 18:17
It can be challenging to stay in touch with our innocence when it is long past. Children hold it for us often. The giggle of a delighted infant can refresh us. The wonder of a child encountering some newness in her life can remind us of when all was new for us. The cuddle as a child trusts us and enfolds him or herself in our lap reminds us of how we all want to be safe and cared for. Not least their wonder at God, how to best know God, how to touch back at God, all this can heal our lost moments and our own wonder.
I will never forget Lindsay, all of age four perhaps, who when asked who I was said clearly, "God!" I was shocked, a little horrified, and pull up into her reality all at once. Her world was still concrete and while I sought to explain that I was God's friend, I knew it went outside her ability to see a difference. Yet it reminded me how purely she saw her life and my life, how open she was to be formed and instructed and how essential was our care in keeping her open to God's reign or kingdom.
By contrast in today's Gospel directly after Jesus holding a child and saying the above, we have the question of a man, a ruler. "Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?" After clarifying that God alone is "good", Jesus recites the commandments to be kept. All of these he feels he has kept from his youth and in his best insight perhaps he has. Yet he is not yet satisfied that he feels connected to eternal life. Jesus' piercing insight is that all that is left to do is sell his possessions to the benefit of the poor and join Jesus. This he cannot do for he is accustomed to much wealth and thus comfort.
We are left to wonder what becomes of him. Is it life as usual with keeping the commandments? Does he slowly begin to let go of some comfort as he seeks eternal life? Does he one day come to realize these comforts stand in the way of his displaying the full care of God for others or does he seek to turn them into a tool for generous living toward others? We do not know but all are possible.
What we know is this moment causes Jesus to look deeper with his disciples. He shares that possessions can keep us at a distance from open trust in God, from enfolding the needy into the lap of our deep care, to wonder at the potential wholeness of the world when there is more than just sharing of wealth. In truth wealth/possessions have the power to be tools of God's reign or blocks to it. Wealth so frequently viewed as a sign of blessing from God, does have a larger purpose than we often note.
All this causes Peter to wonder, "Look, we have left our homes and followed you." He is a little defensive, hopeful of justification, uncertain how God blesses those who follow and develop a heart for the things of God.
Thus Jesus "said to them, 'Truly I tell you, there is no one who has left house or wife or brothers or parents or children, for the sake of the kingdom of God, who will not get back very much more in this age, and in the age to come eternal life.'" Luke 18:29-30
What he does not say is what we will get back in return for this trust. Some want it to be material but I think not. What we get back is relationship to ourselves, to others, to God. We become connected as we grow in generosity. We learn it as we let go of some possession, some power so as to achieve God's good. We grow in hope, our deepest needs will be seen and met. We become a little like Lindsay who would easily hand me her toy, her candy, her trust and in her capacity trust me. Did she know I would always pretend for a moment it was mine? Did she know I would always hand it back? Were there moments she wanted me to keep it so she would feel her own generous heart?
It makes me wonder. What now must I do to be fitted to eternal life?
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